How to gradually change beliefs:
Step 1: Make peace with where you are right now:
Rather than resisting your current belief and pushing against “what is”, try to let go of the idea that you need to fight off beliefs that aren’t serving you. Focusing on how you dislike your current beliefs only activates them further and makes them stay in your current experience. Instead, make peace with where you are. How to do that:
- Most of us have the starting point of having an out of the vortex thought about where we are
- Awareness is the first stage: becoming aware of the thoughts you are thinking
- The next stage is soothing the negative thoughts with soothing self-talk and pivoting until you feel more at peace with where you are.
(eg. I am where I am, and that’s ok. Even though I’m here now, I don’t have to be here forever. I know life is dynamic and things change so this too can change. I feel like that’s possible that this too shall pass and it’s just a temporary blip. I trust that things will sort out in time. All I have to do is focus on feeling the best that I can right now, focus on the good things around me, and try to reach for feeling a little better gradually. Knowing that it’s ok to be where I am because it’s just where I am *right now* and not forever is quite comforting.. kind of a relief to know that! So where I am right now isn’t a big deal at all because it’s just temporary. It’s ok.. everything’s ok.. where I am is ok.. I’m doing ok.. I’m in the process of learning how to improve my situation, and I know I can pivot it in time.. I have time.. I can be patient about it.. I know I can get there… I think I’m feeling a little better already… I’m getting there… I know it’s a journey and this point is just a step on the journey, and every step is an ok place to be because it is an important step towards leading somewhere better and better…).
Step 2: Shift your vibration about your current unhelpful beliefs:
Create doubt about the current belief that you want to pivot, to help deconstruct it. Metaphorically remove the legs of the table of that belief so that it can no longer stand as tall and strong. You deconstruct the old belief by asking yourself: Is your current belief really true? Am I absolutely 100% certain that it’s true without any shadow of a doubt? Or maybe there is a tiny chance it’s not true? maybe even a bigger than tiny chance? Are there some people or animals or stories you’ve heard that disprove your current belief and support a new more positive belief? Take each supporting fact that is currently letting the “table” stand and give believable reasons why that fact is not true.
Step 3: Practise the art of creating new beliefs on easier things first (unrelated to the BIG things)
Practising on little things like manifesting a button will make it easier to believe you have the power to manifest a castle. So practise on manifesting a parking spot, free-flowing traffic, a moment where rain stops just when you want to go out, manifesting seeing a butterfly, finding a feather or a piece of blue glass or anything trivial that doesn’t have a lot of emotional charge behind it. This can help give you confidence in your ability to believe in your ability to change your beliefs for the things you consider to be big and more meaningful.
Step 4: Practice feel-good focus on the new belief – then practice some more!
Abraham say a belief is just an idea you keep thinking about, so here are a few possible ways to “keep thinking about it” in a positive way. Here are a few suggestions:
(NB You don’t have to use all of these techniques; each method can help on its own or in combination with the other methods)
a.) Visualization exercises:
Make your new belief more real by imagining it. What would it look like? What would it feel like if it was currently present in my experience? fleshing it out helps make it feel more real.
b.) Believable Positive self-talk:
Repeat soothing thoughts to yourself. These can be general or specific to the belief you want to grow. Let me explain a little more of what I mean by general self-talk and what I mean by specific self-talk:
- (i.) – General positive self-talk
- “I know my inner being / universe is supporting me and wants the best for me”
- “I know my inner being / universe is guiding me to good-feeling places.”
- “Everything inevitably works out wonderfully for me.”
(These all help provide a vibrational set point where good things are coming to you, including that new belief that you want to nurture.)
- (ii.) – Specific positive self-talk
There are several ways of having specific positive self talk.
One example is this great guide I found by AbeForum member angelman66:
I WANT TO BELIEVE…(fill in the blank)
I am working toward believing…
Believing this will allow me to….
I want to believe this because….
Others believe this and they are able to…
Specific self-talk is about:
- - Repeating soothing thoughts that are specifically about what you want to believe.
- - Going Softly: Soften the belief to a level you can accept. Start softly rather than with strong affirmations that are out in the bushes (because repeating words you don’t believe won’t help; you have to train your vibration to a new place of belief *gradually, softly, gently, patiently*).
- - Reach for more and more better-feeling statements: Form positive statements about the subject you want to believe and which feel better and give you a feeling of relief or a sense of fun, and repeat these kinds of words to yourself, practising gently, whenever you feel the time is right for practising the work.
- eg. what if I woke up tomorrow and found X had manifested?! that would be so cool! I don’t have to figure out the “how” – the Universe can take care of the How. All I have to do is line up with my desire. I know other people have achieved X, so I guess it’s possible, and if it’s possible for them, I guess it’s possible for me too. Wouldn’t it be nice to have X.. I can imagine myself having X.. cue visualization.. In an equally real reality parallel universe, there could be a version of me who already has X – I just have to line up with that and I can bring that reality into my reality.. Imagine what it would be like after the manifestation has happened.. imagine going to the forums or to an Abe workshop and telling everyone the good news! That’ll be fun too! etc etc
The specific positive self-talk is also a good time to catch any onion layers of compounding thoughts and beliefs around the subject and pivot those too.
(eg Someone who wants to manifest abundance with money, may have a limiting belief that all rich people are snobs, or may worry that their friends and family may be jealous of them or not look at them in the same way if they suddenly have lots of money. So work on soothing all those onion layers of thoughts and beliefs. It’s not just a matter of being positive about seeing yourself swimming in a pool of money (though that’s fun too!) – it’s also about shifting any deeper (sometimes less obvious) onion-layers of limiting beliefs that are holding you back and which may be keeping you stuck.
A good tool for positive self-talk is using a focus wheel.
c.) Make a vision board that strengthens your focus on your belief
You can make a real-life crafty vision board with magazine cut-outs and glue, or if you’re very arty, you can create paintings and decorate your home with this artwok that helps you picture more of what you want, or you can make a virtual vision board on the computer eg on pinterest.
d.) Be open and flexible about how your positive belief can manifest things in your life
Your job isn’t to figure out the specific “how” something will manifest. (eg “If I line up with having loads of money, I have to win the lottery” – Instead be open to more ways that money can flow into your existence once you’ve lined up with a general feeling of abundance). If you line up your beliefs that something is possible, it can come to you in ways that will surprise and delight you – and that’s more fun than strictly trying to control the specific way it will come to you.
Fun synchronicity side note: As I was writing this and thinking about the importance of “believing in yourself”, I was listening to the radio and the song “Have a Little Faith in Me” came on! \(^_^)/ yay! synchronicities!